Hey people! Have you ever wondered whether exes can remain friends?
To say that “exes can be friends” can spark a debate that can be just as impassioned as anything that Democrats and Republicans experience a regular basis. So can exes really be friends?
Whether she cheated on you or you cheated on her, yes, you can be friends; but should you be friends? Under what circumstances can you say you can never really let the incident go and totally forget about the thought of each other’s existence? What do friends mean? Do you hang out with each other? Or is being mutually civil pass up as being ‘friends’? They say ‘time heals all wounds’, but how long would it take? And under what circumstances?
See, there are tons and tons of things to talk about when it comes to exes being friends. And while I can never fully answer those questions for you, I can only tell you this: there certainly is a lot of work to do if you are looking towards a platonic, non-dysfunctional and more socially acceptable relationship with your past love.
Here are some ways that you, dear men, can win your exes back not as lovers but as friends:
Do not rush it. This is what most men just cannot quite get. Which part of ‘do not rush’ is hardest to understand? Sure, there are certain scenarios where boyfriends and girlfriends somehow realize they are not for each other and they break up today, they are friends tomorrow. But sadly, this is not the case for most people. You’d have to wait ‘til she feels she’s ready to look at you without either getting mad or crying.
Do not expect too much. She was hurt. She was mad. Or maybe she still is, even when she can look at you in the face and be totally civil with you. She will not welcome you with a hug or say thanks to you (except when she has fully realized how much better her life is when you guys broke up) and she may not even tell you that naughty thought in her mind that you used to know at one glance. Dude, things have changed. And remember, if there are reasons why you should be friends with your ex, there are also reasons why you shouldn’t be friends.
Respect her boundaries. And since you are not to expect anything from her, you should also be able to respect where she places herself in this so-called renewed friendship with you. If she does not want to go out with you, even for “old times’ sake”, do not easily assume that is because she still has feelings for you. She just does not like your face all that much anymore, and I wish I was really just kidding about that.
Do not talk about feelings, your new girlfriend, or the past. Out of respect, out of good humor and well wishes for a better future, and out of logic and etiquette, these things are not recommended topics for conversation when you’re trying to be friends with your former ladylove.  And don’t think you can get away with a simple subtle joke about her dating life or the new guy in her life.
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